Unconditional love

An interesting theological discussion nearly took place in Zac's last night. Blossom is of the opinion that you can ask for forgiveness in advance. ''Look, December's coming up. I'm going to drink too much and do things I shouldn't. Doesn't it make sense to get my sorries in first?'

There's not a lot you can say to that, hence the discussion nearly but didn't take place.

What was discussed more was the idea of loving one's self. Jesus tells us to love God and to love our neighbour as our selves. If I don't love myself, how can I love my neighbour? Occasionally this is taken to extremes and becomes arrogance but I think that there are far more Christians who struggle to love themselves. Even those who seem most secure and confident often have deep-seated hatred - or certainly dislike - for themselves.

This can be the result of upbringing, of never being shown love, of being constantly put down, or of an experience of 'love' of the most vile kind.

Or it can be an awareness of sin in one's life and not being able to totally comprehend and accept God's forgiveness. Not being able to quite believe that God can love someone so imperfect. Which is the crux of Christianity.

Grace. A just God giving us what we don't deserve (forgiveness, love) and not giving us what we do deserve (punishment). I know it's something I haven't properly grasped yet; I struggle with liking myself - because I know what I'm really like.

Deni did a neat summing-up of what God's love is that included the word 'unconditional'. That's the difference. God knows what I'm really like and still he loves me. If only I could believe that.
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Forgive us our trespasses

In work this morning, Alun was flicking through the Bible, trying to find something - he didn't have any real work to do and wanted to make it look as if he were doing something useful - when he said, 'Where's Ezra?'

I looked at him. 'There 's a book in the Bible called Ezra? They haven't made a film of that one.'

I really am amazingly ignorant about matters religious. Sometimes I fear I will be found out and defrocked - or whatever the evangelical charismatic equivalent of that is - but then I remember I used to be part of a pub quiz team that included six Christians, three in positions of authority, who sometimes got the biblical questions wrong. That makes me feel better.

I know the important things. I know the things that don't come simply from reading a book.

In Zac's tonight we looked at forgiveness from the point of us forgiving others. It's rarely easy but until we do, we don't have peace. But even when we can forgive, we don't forget. But we don't have to.

The thing is that when God forgives us, he does forget.

Love keeps no record of wrongs.

War and peace

I don't know much about Islam. I've heard respected imams talking about it on the radio and they claim that it is a peaceful religion. But I imagine in most writings it's possible to find something that seems to encourage violence.

An eye for an eye.

But Jesus was quite plain when he spoke about the subject.

Love your neighbour as yourself.
'Who is my neighbour?'
Your enemy is your neighbour.
'But he keeps upsetting me!
Forgive him.
'I've tried that but he keeps on doing it.'
Forgive him 70 times 7 times.

It's not an easy creed. It's not a 'let's love everybody and give them flowers' creed; it's an everyday living creed. It's hard.

Sean talked about this in Zac's on Tuesday, and lots of people joined in the discussion. For some it seemed almost easy. 'This is what we have to do so, with God's help, I'll do it.' For others it seemed an impossible task.

Our Father, ... Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us.

If it depends on me forgiving first, then I'm done for; forever condemned. What's more I have to live with guilt and unforgiveness in my heart, a burden to weigh me down.

God knows we're weak but a willing heart is all he seeks. If I can just choose to ask for help to make me want to forgive, then the process of forgiveness has begun. It's a long, long way from outright forgiveness but it's a start.

There seems to be so much more to say. Taking the step from personal actions to state deeds. Too much to say here.

Let peace come and let it begin with me.