So, during the summer, I've been going to the gym. While there I use the treadmill. You'll have seen people on the treadmill (or on the treadmill on television) jogging away like mad, the perspiration dripping from their brows, their breaths coming in short pants. Now picture this: me walking - quickly admittedly - but barely raising a glow let alone sweat, and - and this is the crunch - clinging onto the hand-bars for dear life.
I have this fear you see, doctor, that if I let go, I'll lose concentration and next thing I'll go shooting off the end. You see it's a very logical fear: all my fears are.
{Siadwel, a Welsh comedian tells of his auntie and her fear of the ground. "She says, 'It's not the jumping off a skyscraper that will kill you; it's the ground.'"}
And I'm scared to try running in case the same thing happens and I won't be able to reach the controls and slow down and the machine will go faster and faster and ... I'll sssccchhhhhwump - be off the end.
Last night I very bravely let go for a few minutes. Even in that time I was drifting all over the place. Imagine if I got carried away. And if I was wearing my headphones and watching, say, rugby, at the time, I could be strangled by my leads!
I thought talking about it might help, but it's just made me think of more dangers.
Assuming there would be lots of people who feel the same, I googled for a cartoon of someone flying off the end of a treadmill: there weren't any.
Must just be me then.
