This is how the argument goes

"If I had tickets for the play I wouldn't be going to exercise."

"But you don't have tickets."

"No, but if I did - and if the art exhibition had been this week - I wouldn't be going to exercise."

"Your point is?"

"Well, if I had a good reason I wouldn't feel guilty about not going."

"Hm."

"What does 'Hm' mean?"

"What do you think it means?"

"It means you're trying to make me feel guilty."

"That's the job of your conscience."

"You are my conscience!"

Brief silence.

"But I've been working hard in the garden this afternoon so I'm not going! There, I've decided."

"If that's what you've decided . . ."

"I hate it when you leave a sentence with an ellipsis. It means you think I should think again."

"Hm."

"Oh shut up!"

So, yes, I've been working hard. Oh, I forgot to tell you: I grew a potato!

Do you remember I had some old potatoes in the pantry so stuck them in a tub to see what would happen? Well, they shot up. 

I think you're supposed to wait until they bloom before harvesting them but I couldn't wait any longer so pulled one up, and there it was, my first potato.

"How do you know it's not the one you planted originally?" Husband asked.

"Because it's young and firm and beautiful."

"One potato grown for one potato planted doesn't seem a very good ratio."

He won't be saying that when I harvest a whole plateful. He'll want some then.

As I've decided not to plant new bushes in the bamboo area until next year I thought I might as well plant some other old potatoes I had in the pantry. (I don't usually let potatoes go beyond; it was just circumstances.)

I only hope they're more successful than my single cauliflower plant.