Monday, September 03, 2018

A plot to drive me crazy

Before I begin let me ask my overseas visitors if they are familiar with weetabix?

It's a breakfast cereal that comes as biscuits in packs of 12, 24 or 48. I eat two with milk each morning, which works out fine and dandy.

Until a grandchild comes to stay and eats a single weetabix. Leaving me with an odd number in the packet. So what, you may ask.

I don't know why but it starts the day off badly if I find only one biscuit left in the packet. Or if I know I'm going to be leaving one in the packet.

Having reached the single one at the end of the last box - grandchildren had been staying - I fanned myself, gave me a good talking-to, and had three for breakfast that day.

Since then we've had no grandchildren to stay and I have not been aware of anyone eating weetabix in the middle of the day or as a snack so the next packet would have an even number and all would be well in my world again.

Imagine then, if you will, my stress this morning on discovering an odd one at the bottom. (I am rocking in my chair just thinking about it now.)

I confronted Husband. 'There was an odd weetabix this morning. Did you take one out of the packet? Are you trying to drive me crazy? Is it a cunning plot so you can have me put away and bring in your dolly bird instead?'
'Dolly bird?' he said. 'I haven't heard that phrase for years. Do you remember my dad always used to use it?'
'You're not answering my question!'
'You're already quite crazy but, no, I haven't removed a weetabix.'

A long discussion ensued then when I suggested maybe the manufacturers had started putting 13 in the packet - they haven't - which confused Husband as he insisted they'd have to put 11 in the other packet and that would be lopsided. My logic made perfect sense to me but he couldn't see it.

I shall keep you updated on the weetabix saga but if Husband suggests getting the loft converted I shall definitely be worried. We've all read Jane Eyre. (Actually I haven't but I know the plot.)





8 comments:

Ole Phat Stu said...

"packs of 12, 24 or 48" also cover for people who eat three at a time, or four, or six, or 12. So the manufacturer has obviously put some thought into optimal packaging schemes ;-) Imagine if they had packed prime numbers :-(

What annoys me more, is that here in Germany, hot dog buns come in different sized packages from hot dog sausages.
Why can't the manufacturers agree on either 4 or 6, but both of the same parts count? Grrrr!! They made the Wurst choice :-(

Anonymous said...

Liz--No, I've not heard of Weetabix; but, from your description, I would posit that they are similar to America's Shredded Wheat. Shredded Wheat comes in two configurations: 1) large biscuits such as you describe and 2) small biscuits, one of which fits nicely in a small spoon. The large biscuits come in a box of 3-packs - I'm guessing there's a total of 12 biscuits per box (I have no box on hand, having pitched the last one about 10 days ago.) Strangely enough, Elder Brother and I use 1.5 biscuits as a serving. Hunky Husband doesn't eat them at all. OTOH: At his own home, Elder Brother stocks the small biscuits and counts them out into his bowl.

Stu--You may recall that, in America, we have a disparity of apportionment. In general, our dogs come in packages of 8 or 10 (my preferred bran contains 6) while buns are normally 8 per package. Today, if I remember to do so at lunchtime, I shall fix myself a bun filled with shredded beef in barbeque sauce - to help use up some extremely old dog buns. By wrapping the sandwich in foil and sticking it into the toaster oven for a few minutes, the buns will surely be steamed sufficiently to be edible without a chisel.
Cop Car

Anonymous said...

"my preferred bran" is actually "brand". Will I never learn to read before publishing?
CC

nick said...

I'm looking for my copy of "Sherlock Holmes and the mystery of the single Weetabix" but it seems to have gone missing. Most unusually, I had a Weetabix for breakfast the other day, and wasn't very impressed. Either very dry if eaten as it is, or instantly soggy if you add milk. What's the big attraction? (I prefer granola myself)

Anonymous - No, Shredded Wheat is completely different from Weetabix.

SmitoniusAndSonata said...

Weetabix in the summer, porridge in the winter and I glow with virtue till coffee time when unfortunately biscuits seem such a good idea.

Anonymous said...

Porage NOT porridge.
Porage is the Scots' spelling,
Porridge is English - as in gaol ;-)

SmitoniusAndSonata said...

My Scottish grandmother made us all porridge every morning but I don't remember her ever writing to any of us about it so I don't know how she would have spelt it.

Liz Hinds said...

Husband seemed to be thinking I was talking about prime numbers in my logic, Stu. But I'm much too sensible for that. And I spell porage however I feel on the day.

Cop Car, no, we get shredded wheat here too. weetabix is a finer blend, not so stringy. Hope your bun was edible.

I like it soggy, nick, but with just a corner left of crunchy. My grandson eats it dry and I can't think of anything worse. Except perhaps dry shredded wheat.

I'm a weetabix all year sort of girl, sonata. When I have porridge it's usually as a warming lunch. Mmmm.