Zac's is never normal

Not what most people would consider a normal bible study anyway, but last night's was ... even less normal than usual.

Well, you don't get a massage at most bible studies for a start. According to Blossum I have to think about how I'm sitting when I'm using the computer. 'You're all hunched, aren't you? I can feel it in the way your rhomboids are tight. And, oh!' He pressed my neck. 'What have you been doing? There's a huge knot here.'

Jane suggested an exercise she'd been recommended by her physiotherapist son. 'Sit up and push your shoulder blades together.' Or as Andy shouted, 'Stick your boobs out! Be proud of God's creation!'

Meanwhile Blossum is saying, 'Relax, concentrate on your breathing.' I ask you: have you ever tried to concentrate on your breathing while being heckled?

And this was after Martin had said, 'I want to talk to you about your writing.' (I'd read my Easter monologue.) He said, 'You had her gasping again and panting.' (After the last monologue I read in Zac's it was suggested that I take up writing erotica.) But I couldn't work out if he was grumbling or complimenting! (Although it was only a quick gasp this time so he was probably complaining.)

So maybe it was just an extra-unusual night for me.

Jerry was on good form, first accusing the early church of corruption and then insisting that 'If is a big word.' He didn't really expound on that sentence, preferring to repeat it, repeatedly, and let us draw our own conclusions. But then, just when you're getting fed-up of him, he does something amazing. In this case pray. With wisdom and honesty.

He is an enigma. If only he weren't an alcoholic.