Alarm bells ringing

It's not just George who should have been chipped; I should have been too. So that when I try to go in Borders, alarm bells will start ringing loudly and burly security men will rush up and escort me off the premises. 'Sorry, madam, you know you're not allowed in here.'

'Oh but please, I only want a birthday card.'

'That's what they all say.'

'No, but it's true.'

'Come along, madam, please don't be difficult.'

'But ... but ...' I'm still protesting when the door is slammed in my face.

You can go on a chocolate binge and not spend much money; a Borders binge is another matter. But I did need all the things I bought, including the postcard on the left. Why did I need it? Because it made me laugh. This time though I didn't say as much to the young man on the checkout. Last time I pointed out a funny card, he looked at me blankly

xx