Thursday, February 13, 2014

Not being Sean

Steve was supposed to be leading Zac's on Tuesday but he ended up in hospital after a cardiac arrest: the things some people will do to avoid leading. Anyway I offered to do it and afterwards Ric said, 'Well, that was another study you scraped through by the skin of your teeth.'
I asked him what I could do to be better. He replied, 'Be Sean.' Which isn't exactly helpful but true.

The trouble is, for lots of our regulars, it's not so much Zac's place as Sean's place, and anyone trying to step into his shoes is at an instant disadvantage. That aside I don't help myself.

At the end we prayed for one young lad whose mother had just died. In the prayer I asked that God would be a mother to him. 'And father, and brother ...' and instead of stopping there I sort of carried on. And on. I was just about on the verge of asking God to be great-aunt and sister-in-law to the boy when I said, 'and child. No, not child. I don't mean child. I'll stop now. Amen.'

You see I panic. I'll say something with conviction ending it with 'as it says in the bible,' and then I'll doubt myself. And instead of just keeping quiet I say, 'I think it says that in the bible; does it say that in the bible? I think it does.' And I'm usually right but by focusing on it I draw attention to my uncertainty.

Afterwards Nigel took me aside and said, 'when you were praying, just before you said child, I sent up a quick prayer. I said, please stop Liz now; she's waffling.'

So you see it was Nigel and God's fault. But if I hadn't panicked I'd have got away with it because most people would have got bored and stopped listening by then.

I need the gift of authority and the ability to - not bluff exactly but to keep calm and - deny everything.


10 comments:

katney said...

Don't try to be Sean. Be yourself. God loves you just as you are. And so do the folks at Zac's.

and us

Liz Hinds said...

Thanks, Katney!

Anne in Oxfordshire said...

That is exactly what I was thinking..I am sure God does not want you to be Sean..you are you! And God should know , he made you :-)

Liz Hinds said...

True, Anne. He has a lot to answer for!!

Suburbia said...

I reckon I'd have sniggered a bit, had I been there!

katney said...

And God does not call the qualified, he qualifies the called.

(I wasn't going to post that, but I want to see if I can do the word verification which has a heart in it.)

Robyn Lee said...

Well, Liz, whether you thought you waffled or not, you do better than me. When I try to address a meeting or similar, my brain turns to mush, I giggle nervously and in an extreme cases I have an asthma attack.

I hope Steve recovers well, for your sake and his... x

Liz Hinds said...

Some people did, Sub, some people did!

Ah, a heart!

Steve has had his operation and is alive and well and home, thankfully, robyn.

Furtheron said...

Others have said it. Learn from others but be yourself. Honesty in how you present yourself in that kind of situation will stand you in high regard

Welshcakes Limoncello said...

I'm sure God understands, Liz. x