'You don't talk enough.'
Husband has always grumbled that I don't talk enough to him. That I don't tell him my deep thoughts, fears, even dreams. but I don't talk much to anybody.
I'm not good at talking.
I have such a fear of being a bore that should I decide to tell a story, I speak quickly, jumble up my words and leave out great chunks - which inevitably turn out to be vital to the story so that when I finish, expecting my listener to laugh or respond in some way, I am greeted instead by a blank look, re-affirming in my mind the idea that I am innately boring and shouldn't talk.
That was a long sentence. Have you noticed that I usually even write short sentences, brief posts (the previous one being an exception)? Not that I worry about my writing: brevity is just the style I prefer. I am confident about writing because I can think and plan it out ahead.
My verbal inarticulacy probably goes back to my childhood; everything else seems to.
I was born into a large extended family of talkers (and drinkers incidentally) (social drinkers I mean, not alcoholics). I neither talk nor drink. I blame my quietness on never being able to get a word in edgeways. Maybe if I'd taken up drinking ...
Then again, if I talked as much as I write, I really would be a bore.