Saturday, April 04, 2020

The new 'Brexit' war

There was an article in the Times* about the new 'Brexit' argument i.e. the nation is divided again. This time it's between walkers and joggers/cyclists.

I think I mentioned before my frustration with people (joggers/cyclists) not keeping their distance on our daily walks but today I have come up with a revolutionary new design to prevent and protect.
I've done the hard work designing it; all I need now is an engineer to work out the weight balance aspects and to build it and we could be millionaires by the end of this lockdown.

(Also by the end of this lockdown I could be licking Marmite directly from the jar. I started spreading it thinly on my crispbread; two weeks later I'm dolloping it on.)

I had to pick up prescriptions yesterday. as I was driving out of the surgery car park another car was pulling it. I dutifully pulled over to allow the required 2 metres. Better safe than sorry.

Then I had to join the queue outside the chemist. I was number fifteen in the queue. I hadn't anticipated such a long wait so to pass the time I did calf raises and a merry little heel toe jig. These proved to be doubly useful: they kept me warm and encouraged others to step away from me.


13 comments:

Cop Car said...

Hmmm...I can understand the other people's pulling away while you did your heel-and-toe thing. Well done. Fortunately, our pharmacy has a drive-thru pickup window. It's quite a small place and, if there were more than one person waiting inside, 2 meter separation would be difficult.

Liz Hinds said...

Yes, they've closed the inside of the shop and opened a side door.

Cop Car said...

P.S. My engineering perspective on your invention is that you might object to the bolt that I would wish to put through the wearer's neck to stabilize the assembly against rotation. On second thought, if we make it rotate about the neck (as you probably intended all along?)....

Debra She Who Seeks said...

That's a brilliant design!

Liz Hinds said...

I was imaging a yoke type design rather than a Frankenstein one, CopCar.

I think so, Debra!

Polly said...

That's a good ploy to keep people away from you!

Terra said...

Your design is brilliant and you need to get it into production ASAP so you will make millions of dollars. Quite a fashion statement too.

Terra said...

Your design is brilliant and you need to get it into production ASAP so you will make millions of dollars. Quite a fashion statement too.

Marie Smith said...

Lol. Revolutionary design!

Liz Hinds said...

So who'd like to invest?!

SmitoniusAndSonata said...

Are you going to market a variation for grumpy people, using garden rakes instead of brooms?

Liz Hinds said...

Indeed, somebody asked if they were spikes at the end. I think it's definitely an option. Some people only learn through pain.

pam nash said...

ohhhhh - dancing while waiting? Nice. I would have applauded!