Monday, March 06, 2006

There's somebody at the door

As soon as the woman started speaking on the phone last week, my heart sank. I knew what she was going to say. 'In the past blah blah, we've been so grateful blah blah.' And I knew what would come next: will you have a coin collecting card again this year? By the time she got to that point I had psyched myself up to say, 'No, I'd rather not,' so why did my mouth say, 'Yes, okay'?

Was it the thought of brain-damaged babies or just this terrifying inability I have to say no?

You're supposed to leave this card out and ask friends and family to put £1 coins in it. We don't have family locally and we're not in the sort of neighbourhood where people just drop in. I suppose I could invite people round for a meal and then say casually, 'Oh, by the way, would you like to contribute to brain-damaged babies?'

But it's probably easier if I just do what I always do and write out a cheque myself.

It's the same with raffle tickets. Guide Dogs have me down as a sucker and I never win anything. (But the dogs are awfully sweet.)

And men who come to the door. Only last week a Polish student trying to fund his way through art college came selling drawings. Normally, they're like Tommy, deaf, dumb and blind, and they're selling t-towels that don't work, but his drawings were quite good. What exactly I am going to do with a drawing of a little girl posting a letter is not clear yet, but one day, maybe, he will be very famous and I will have an original. I hadn't thought of that before; that makes me feel much better.

We used to have a gypsy come round. She was spookily accurate in the things she said so, although I didn't really need the lacey things you put under things, I thought it safer to buy than to risk being cursed.

I have been known to hide on spotting JWs or sellers. Isn't it odd how you can tell a JW at 100 paces? I know I should tell them about the love about Jesus, but chances are I'd end up becoming a Mormon.

5 comments:

Tim said...

Is that why you are inviting us round for tea again?! I'll bring a pound just in case!

Liz Hinds said...

I hadn't thought of that but now you mention it ...

jodes da princess said...

my mum pretends to be deaf when people in suits come calling. (she's a sign language interpreter so that helps!)

I have often thought of saying 'I'm very sorry I dont speak english' in my perfect English accent. but so far I havent had the guts and end up smiling and nodding.

Chris said...

Like you, Liz, my mouth often doesn't understand my brain when it's trying to tell it to say 'no'. But then my brain often has no control over other parts of me.
Brain: No you don't want chocolate/chips/cake/etc
Other parts: chomp, chomp, chomp
Brain: No you don't need that new skirt and you don't have any money left this month
Other parts: buy, buy, buy
Brain: No you can't go out wearing that
Other parts: WHAT THE HELL'S IT GOT TO DO WITH YOU!!

Anonymous said...

I just bought the same drawing from a polish girl who appeared on my doorstep. The first drawing in the file is an original and the rest are copies. is yours an original? Because mine certainly isn't. £5 but it was worth it because it's a gorgeous print whatever!