Thursday, December 15, 2005

Sharing my wisdom

I am so well-organised that I feel I owe it to the world to offer some advice on cleaning. First of all a little test.

A girl I knew lived at home with her parents. When they went away on holiday she cleaned the skirting and picture rail 'as a nice surprise' for them. If someone cleaned your skirting would you a) be overjoyed; b) notice?

If the answer is a), then you shouldn't read any further; I wouldn't want to upset you.

Now for the rest of us, my advice is simple and can be summed up in five words. Yes, that's right, just five words. They are 'Clean where you can see.' This obviously doesn't include behind sofas or above eye-level. There are only two reasons for anyone to look above eye-level: they are lying on the floor in a drunken stupor - in which case they won't notice the cobwebs - or they are your potential mother-in-law. If the latter is the case, I suggest you reconsider your choice of spouse.

5 comments:

Tim said...

I'm going to expose your dirty skirting boards today. When your back is turned I'll have everyone in fits of laughter looking behind your sofa!

Looking forward to our party?

jodes da princess said...

yes that has worked for me, until a few months ago when we had our, brand new (and still trying to impress as they're a lot older and more competent at being wives than me)house group round, and we had to move some furniture spontaneously to try and accomodate everyone. the armchair was moved to reveal 5 months worth of dust and dirt and other shame.

I hung my head.

from this we learn: plan cleaning around future events, theres no need to be thorough if no-ones going to see it, but at the same time domestic godess is so much more appealing than slovenly housewife!!

Jon said...

Great tactic Josie.

jodes da princess said...

josie?

Jon said...

My apologies. Not paying enough attention.